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    • Anonymous
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      Post count: 4

      Hello everyone,my name is Ian Kerr and I live in Newquay Cornwall with my wife Lisa and our 3 children we have another grown up one at university.Our youngest son is called Gabriel and is nearly four years old,he has been attending a child development centre at our local hospital for 6 months and we are still waiting to find out where on the spectrum he is.These things take time I guess,but we have had lots of good feedback from the people at Treliske hospital.Gabriel has no language as such but does gabble along with something that sounds like a mixture of welsh and chinese.He shows little interest with toys but loves playing with shampoo bottles and my wifes various make up products,he has a happy disposition but shows signs of frustration quite often probably because he can not communicate very well.He has a nice routine going at the moment and I’m sure it is to do with his classes at the hospital,but taking him out for a walk etc can be quite stressful for him,certain shops or places can be a no go area.Everything is still quite confusing and worrying for Lisa and I but we just keep going along and giving him LOVE and AFFECTION and trying to give him a normal life.My greatest fear at the moment is his future,what will his world be like for him when he is a young man?,will he cope?,will he have friends?etc etc etc.Today is Monday 1st October and I only found this website today but it looks interesting,some of the things I have read in the forum sound so familiar so I shall try and reply.It is good to talk.

    • Anonymous
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      Post count: 32

      Hi Ian, and welcome to the forum. I think you’ve touched on every parent’s fears with regard to what the future holds for our children as they get older and, sadly, as we do too. I’d love to have the answer to your questions, as I’m sure would everyone reading this, but I guess all we can do is carry on doing what we feel to be right. We tend to work on the principle that if it feels right it normally is, and if it’s wrong a bite, scratch and a pinch normally reminds you that it isn’t!! Best wishes to you and your family. Dave.

    • Anonymous
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      Post count: 1

      Hello Ian,

      It’s my first time here today and when I read your words I so related to them. My son Lee is now 15 years old and has made great progress over the last 10 years,though he is still very non verbal he understands a lot(simply because he chooses to these days) and is alot more tolerable to change as long as he knows whats happening(symbols or plain pictures)and at times a bribe can work wonders…when he was younger I took him to the park then the shops for his lil sweet,Lee was not keen on the park but he soon realized that after the Park came the shops so he didn’t mind going to the Park after a few months(only,lol)…I have also started the Gluten&Casein free diet and it worked so well,he became more aware and a lot less agitated…it’s well worth trying diffrent thing I think..nobody knows what will happen in the future,but I quiete like the thought that Lee won’t start smoking and drinking or even take drugs..:)which is a big worry to all parents.

      Good luck to you all Bea

    • Anonymous
      Inactive
      Post count: 2

      Hello Ian.
      My husband and I also live in Cornwall, in Camborne and my son is 6 and has autism.
      He has a younger brother who is 2.
      How old is Gabriel at the momment?
      I remeber it took Mikey til he was 3 to use any words and he could not even create sentances til he was 5, though these were normally copied from things he had heard.
      The furture always looks scary when you think about it and I know I do almost daily, but I know if I give my son all the love, attention and help that he needs he will learn to cope, with or without me in the future.
      If you would like to chat anytime feel free to msg me.
      take care

      F.Charman

    • Anonymous
      Inactive
      Post count: 8

      Hi Ian
      I live in Bristol, and my son is 4 1/2. Like you, we can’t take our son to places we used to take for granted – we discovered that the noise, visual stimulation, people etc. disturbed him a lot, or he would behave in ways that showed us he was trying to shut it all out. He talked late, copied lines from tv or books, and now talks when he wants to, and we have learnt not to bombard him with q’s as he needs time to answer (if he does at all). There is always sign language I guess, wish I’d tried it as he gets frustrated, (and us too).
      I daren’t think of the future,and I know I have so many fears about his life. He doesn’t have any little friends, but doesn’t know any different yet. I live on an emotional rollercoaster just being in the present. Someone gave me some good advice recently -take care of the present and what you do now will take care of the future!
      I often feel very alone with it all, so its nice to say hello to you and know there are a lot of us out there. And yes, love and affection is all!! Our little chap is on the Handle programme which certainly helps, and I highly recommend it. Also we have just banned tv and pc’s, as it was getting to a fever pitch of an obsession. Hard to do, but life is a bit calmer this week and he seems happier to do other things.
      It’s good to talk –
      Warmest wishes
      Deejane

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