Aspergers Syndrom

[Anonymous]

#3654

Note: SFTAH transferred this from old data base when site was updated, thus date and name lost, all dates 2006 & 2007 changed during changeover to odd dates.Would love to hear from any other parent with a child with Aspergers. My son is 12 and only recently diagonsed, daily life is sometimesunbearable for me and my daughter.Would like to chat about other parents experiences, and how you cope.Thanks Jo

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Edited by - Just Jo on 10/21/2006 12:51:14

[Anonymous]

#4780

Hi Jo,

I’m new here, nice to chat with you.

My son is 10 and was diagnosed at 8 with ADS although that was only because they wanted him to get a bit older before officially “labelling” him.

I’m not actually too sure how I cope generally like you, mine is unbearable at the moment, temper tantrums, lying…the list is endless!

My plan…laugh because if I don’t I’ll either find myself imprisoned in my own home or crying under the duvet!

Regards

Lucy xx

[Anonymous]

#4781

I too find day to day life unbearable, again another day when the school have rang me excluding him for 3 days.

I have cried most of the day to be honest.

He lies to his friends and they know he is lying. It breaks my heart.

I just dont know what to do anymore.

[Anonymous]

#4779

im a 17 year old girl with aspergers syndrome there is hope out there i was only diagnosed when i was 14 years old which was of course a big shock and caused me to suffer with bouts of deep depression,anxiety,agorphobia and self-harm but in time i think you do get over things i still have my days when i a bit ‘wobbly’ but i hope someday i’ll come to terms with myself and the thing inside of me which i hate being there it makes us soooooooooooooo frustrated it is unbearable to think about at times my family have had it rough with me but they undestand as much as they can and expect its part of me who i am my identity they love me for who i am and what i am and whatever i do they come running back to me with lots of love cuddles and wipe away the tears and help me start all over again with me still feeling guilty but feeling better than before you have to try to understand the confusing world we see it as it not our world as such it’s the normal peoples and doesn’t want or belong to us and we have to willing accept that as part of ourself when we look in the mirror and what stares back at us no-one actually likes not even the normal people lol!but there it is

[Anonymous]

#4778

Hi krackerz1590
who ever told you you wern`t normal?……….. Having Aspergers syndrome doesnt make you “not normal.” Have you ever considered that maybe its us “neuro-typical” people who are not normal? Having Aspergers Syndrome shouldnt be looked upon as having a disability,or as an excuse, it should be seen as a gift. This is because you are unique, just like everyone else in the world.there will never be another you. You are a very special person, and there will be lots of people who love you very much. I know that at times you may find us very hard to understand, it is the same for us, to sometimes understand how you feel. but Aspergers Syndrome shouldn`t set you apart from others. You will have talents that we dont have, you will be good at some things and not at others. If others around you can accept you for who you are, then you must do the same….you are a very special person,just like everyone else who has been diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome. It is only a name after all….it is NOT you. you are an individual, with your own special life to live. I do hope things get better for you, but you will need to accept that a diagnosis does not change the person,it only changes your outlook. you are still the same person you were before you recieved your diagnosis..a very special person.

[Anonymous]

#4777

Greetings! My name is Regina. I am a mother of two wonderful boys, both with developmental disabilities. My oldest son, age 14, has asperger’s syndrome. This comes with a cluster of other conditions. The ones that affect him the most are: ADHD, OCD, and a high level anxiety disorder. We have been working with a Psychiatrist who has successfully treated his conditions I just mentioned, but his autism is becoming more prevalent with adolescence. As brilliant as he is, he is currently failing most of his classes. Things are becoming more difficult as his awareness of his disability increases. I am looking forward to talking to a group of parents with the same challenges, and hope to be able to offer help as well.

Regina

[Anonymous]

#4776

Jo,
In response to your post on 10/21/06 (I know… better late than never). When my son was diagnosed I initially did a lot of reading. There was a moment when I felt like I needed to reference this diagnosis in an attempt to help people see him in a different light. No, he is not a child who is out of control, or needs discipline, or is malicious…he is a beautiful child trying to make sense of how things work, and expressing his distress at not being able to do so. I find what works for me is to avoid situations he cannot be successful in and when he is having a difficult time I just hold him. He goes from being rigid and anxious (or even angry) to a puddle of vulnerability. People take their cues from you; showing love through the worst of it will go so much farther than any other technique. This is true with my son at least. He has a very strong sense of self and dignity-preserving that is part of what makes our relationship so dear. I would love to hear how you are doing. My son is 14, in the throes of puberty, and struggling with the usual ugliness of his peers. (and they can be ugly)

Regina
lunar650@yahoo.com
http://360.yahoo.com/lunar650

[Anonymous]

#4775

hi there [:)]

i am autistic, have grown up and through many challanges my autism has brought me.
obvioulsy i do not know your son, but i can speak generally. autism makes intimacy and being with people hard. in some autistics, it can be or become extremely painful and even threatening. there are many issues we could look at, but i will pick just two.

if your son is finding everything and everyone ‘painful’, he may do two things – close down/run away, or ‘hit back’. hurting someone with words is a classic way to get them to move away to avoid the interaction or the ‘intimacy of family life’. his fixation with gore or death may be a curiosity that you find replusive, but may also serve his purpose of making you ‘move away’ from him. this mode of being obvoxious may be his only means of pushing you all away as much as he can. this doesnt make it right or excusable.

secondly he may have severe food allergies which can alter mind and mood and bring about agressive or very moody behavoir, as can a lack of omega 3’s etc –
just a couple of points to think about [;)]

dexy

[Anonymous]

#4782

Hi just read your message - im new to this whole universe . Your message has frightened me , my son is only 6 but manipulating me and yelling at me when he does not get his own way. I thought this was just my bad parenting, but he has been disgnosed with aspergers. What shopuld i expect as he gets older? Hope its good news

[Anonymous]

#4783

Hi to all, I am new to this site but I have a son who is 21 and has High Level Autism/Asperger's, ADHD, Anxiety disorder and ODD.I can understand and sympathise with you all as I have been there. My son was diagnosed at age 7 with ADHD and age 12 with aspergers/High level autism. We had from age 2 to 19/20 horrendous arguements, tantrums, lies, school exclusions, panic attacks(age 12 to present) violence towards us and his brother but I must tell you there is light at the end of the tunnel 🙂In the last 2 years his behaviour has greatly improved although we still have a few things thrown and door slammed etc every now and then but they are not every day more like once a month or so. He has a girlfriend now as well!!! He still has his problems and the most difficult is finding a job and keeping it. His last employer dismissed him because he broke a bucket in frustration so he now going to a employment tribunal with our help.One thing I would say is never give up even on your worse day, these kids are sent to brighten up our world and I must admit my son over the years has nearly sent me over the edge. But I would never change him he is georgous and I love him to bits.So my advice is Fight for your child to get the help they need, Stick by your rules and don't bend, times will be hard but they do get better 🙂 and make sure you are claiming Disability Living allowance for them.Good luck to one and allSandra

[Anonymous]

#4784

Im not sure either. My DD seemed very highly sensitive as a small child but she has kind of grown out of them or at least can cope in less than ideal settings now. However, my DS has not grown out of them and we are now awaiting his first assessment appt with the community paediatrician to see if he has Aspergers or something. Im not sure there is exactly a difference. I gather that many Aspergers people have a highly sensitive nervous system – thats a typical trait for them although obviously the converse is not true – having a highly sensitive nervous system does not necessarily mean you have Aspergers. I think its your reaction to your sensitivity which may show the difference, if you see what I mean??

[Anonymous]

#4785

hi i am new to this site but am struggling to get my son diagnosed and wondered if anyone could give me any suggestions, My son is 10yrs old and while doing really well at school and in top sets for all subjects he can be a different child at home. he has behaviour outbursts, shouting screaming and throwing things when things dont go right, he is a perfectionist at doing things and will re do things untill he feels they are right. He lacks tact when making comments to or about people. He has no self confidence and often says he is a bad person and wants to die. there are many more traits he has from eating certain foods, cooked in a certain way, only wearing certain clothes because they feel 'funny' to skipping every 5 steps and twirling round when he goes through a door way, I have sought help from professionals but i get told its my fault i am making him a nervous child !! can anyone help many thanks

[Anonymous]

#4786

Hi (I'm 24) and my brother is 10 years old and has been diagnosed with Aspergers. I do not live with my brother, and my grandparents look after him most of the time. But i love him dearly and I try and see him every weekend for a day. Most recently he has taken to swearing – using very strong language esp. the F*** word, plus he keeps flashing his willy.Both myself and my grandparents are finding this difficult to handle and even to prevent - is this 'normal' of Aspergers sufferers? I want to tell him off for swearing as i do not believe he should be doing it - but how can i stop him? The more i tell him to stop the more he shouts and keeps saying the words, and ignoring it does nothing to stop him either.

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