Home Forums Frequently Asked Questions In Need Of Urgent Help pls!!! Re: In Need Of Urgent Help pls!!!

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Hey Lily,

This may sound like a bloody stupid question, but have you asked your son why he uses abusive and violent behaviour, at all? Not in an aggressive way, you understand, but in the tone of voice you might use to ask why he’d chosen a blue shirt to wear.

I refuse to use physical force of any kind on my kids, simply because I used to have the **** beaten out of me as a kid, and my son, at around the age of 4/5 used to throw some quite horrific paddies! I reckon I can use my intellect to much better efect. A bit more difficult with a 12 year old, I appreciate, but I would let mine punch himself out and then ask him why he was hitting me. It had quite a disarming affect. Maybe try it with the abusive language to start with?

This may sound like naive advice, I accept, but I’ve yet to meet anyone who wasn’t “normal”, by my estimation. Sometimes it’s just necessary to throw things at them (figuratively) that they aren’t expecting – get them to think another way, you know?

Best regards



Originally posted by illy
HI Jayne, was wondering how i get reffered to you, as i really am at a loss as to what to do, where to go, and hope to cope most of the time
As i have a 12 year old boy with ADHD, and possible ODD too, things have really took there toll on me
Thankyou for taking the time to reply

Thanks Elain

There is always tomorrow!